Bundle of blunders.

I lie here quietly in the shadows of my room. As rays of sunlight breaks the still darkness of the atmosphere. The winds of the early morning breeze causes my pale curtains to flutter, and more light gushes in. 

And I wait. 
Wait for the first thought of the day to creep into my head..



I like to write. 

Always have. There are many mediums which one can pour emotions into, be it music, dance, exercising, (drugs,smoking, drinking; God bless your soul ) and even food. I put mine in words.


I want to give thanks. Strangely enough, give thanks for every single plunder I have fell into. You see,
giving thanks for the good things is something that anyone could do. It aint original.

Why give a man what he already has?

Why do unto yourself what you can already do?

Therefore, give sight to a man blind at birth;

And do unto yourself what you are truly worth.

                                               ~Joyce Khoo (inspirations before breakfast)          

My life is pretty easy. Fair share of pain and grief. But relatively easy to many. 
Yet, it is the little things that can drive me insane. A whole culture and obsession of trying to be perfect,
act perfect, look perfect. But why? I've asked myself countless of times.


But nevertheless.
I give thanks. That within a personal struggle to battle this chaotic yet silent war, I recognize myself a 
little more. I recognize how massively flawed I am yet I know I am far from worthless, simply because I choose not to be. 


I wouldn't say I have everything figured out. Heck. I often have no clue what I really am doing.
But isn't that how life is suppose to be. You're not suppose to know it all, neither are you suppose to have it all. What's the fun in that?


For when you win some, you rejoice. When you lose some, you try again.

If I knew I would never fail,

 I wouldn't have to try. 

I would think I have it all,

ignorantly living a lie.

So to all out there that feel a little lost,

a little down, 

and a little empty.

Know that this game hasn't ended,

the prizes, 

there are plenty.

Wondering how I measure up,

My reflection right against the wall.

Gazing back a girl in the mirror,

trying to fight it all.

To fight the pressures of a material world,

to fight protocol.

They say it's really nothing,

they say you should not fear.

You think it should be easy,

But answers are never that clear.

For Little miss perfect bangs at the door,

and she just won't go away.

She's looking to cling to me,

She's looking for a place to stay.

So in my troubles, 

I want to find a place my heart can delight.

A joy from above to fulfill one's heart,

A joy from doing what's right.

Look at me my child,

and tell me what do you see?

 Have I ever told you,

that you aren't good enough for me?

For if you saw yourself through my own eyes,

your sorrows,

your fears would disappear.

For my heart longs for your joyfulness,

as I watch over you,

my presence near.

So never again will you ever belittle yourself.

Don't let others determine your grade.

For you belong to me,

my child.

And you are fearfully and wonderfully made

With that thought.

I give thanks.